by jhon baker

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my breath stinks
my armpits smell
my stomach aches
I am not the man I thought I was
better to be dead
then have to spend a
lifetime dying. but
I’d be awkward as anyone
else in anyother life
so there is only
this and
with all,
it perseveres.
I cannot wash the
stain of maleness
off my clothes
I am not the man I ought to have been
only recently realizing
that I have to obliterate all
that should not be known
or read, less it be known
and read.
and still,
my breath stinks,
my armpits smell.
my stomach aches.
 – Hoc Scripsi

8 Comments to “Untitled”

  1. honest and open.. great stuff 🙂

  2. the stain of maleness from my clothes….that is a powerful line..the screams repression in need of resolve…the parts played as male and female are so diverson from that inner person we are…well done Jhon…bkm

  3. Takes me to many different places especially the line stain of maleness. Love it. BTW…made you blog of the day.

  4. I too love the 'stain of maleness.' And your use of repetition opening and closing is effective. “Spend a lifetime dying” is also a keen observation. Nice work.

  5. Really hits me, because I can see my Kevin in it too. Brought tears to my eyes.

  6. “than to spend a lifetime dying” – perhaps one of the starkest lines I have ever read. Wowzers, powerful stuff! Made me think about all the stuff I need to sort through, too, and get rid of:)Big bonfire coming up!

  7. Good and dark Jhon.
    You are what you are…

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