Archive for May, 2010

May 14, 2010

morning Babble

by jhon baker

five thirty this morning I started my day. By six am I was making paper airplanes.
My sons first paper airplane was completed today and he learns the lesson again of practice practice practice. This lesson in life cannot be learned enough, it lessens the burden of disappointment when things doing go as well as we had hoped.
I always walk up to this keyboard with nothing on my mind to say and today is no different. A large part of this is that writing here is usually the first thing I do after making coffee, half written before the coffee is ready I tend to fade in and out of consciousness while I am writing. This leads to interesting tangents on most days and others a garbled mess that I don’t go back to reread. This is the price of a daily blog- the admittance that I cannot find a way in everyday, and there are bad weeks but I try to walk away from those intact.

rentrant

Because I am no more beautiful
    than you,
my tenderness is forgotten
my holy love is scattered across
    America;
with only ___________ driving me ahead.

And this is old.
this is the last thought of a 23-year-old man.
Discovered a decade later during a
time of low productivity,
(without which it would not have been discovered)
and since they say you can never go home.
I won’t.

 – Hoc Scripsi

Hey, let the bells ring.

May 13, 2010

the perfect blossom of a cherry tree

by jhon baker

I love the cherry tree for its blossom, I enjoy the fruit as well and can do neat things with the stem but in all reality the blossom is preferred.
it’s fleeting, beautiful and the center of many poems that range from okay to exquisite. O want to plant several in my yard and rid myself of the conifers. I wish to be surrounded by fleeting beauty, I wish to adorn my driveway with pink flowers that move like oceanic waves in the wind.
I’ve been awake for an hour now and wish that I could have slept through this storm, normally this is a non issue but not last night. After many years I had a good run of quality sleep and now this too has passed, I can honestly say I enjoyed it completely.
My favorite flower is the sunflower, I’ve yet to write a poem to the sunflower directly but it is not for trying. Those poems always end up about something else.

having trouble finding the way in

listening to Rachmaninov with lowered breath
while coffee cooks in the kitchen.
New York Philharmonic in zenith.
typewriter in ribbon bliss.

two floors down the Laundromat takes
four quarters to wash and four quarters to
bring the clothes and towels to a slight
dampness. two floors up, we dance on
tiled floor and make love on soft Chicago carpeting

some stop writing when it feels
finished.
some fight to line everything
correctly – verse/line/stanza.
others never thought about it and
just wrote until the words ran out.
I am fighting to make the end of this not read
‘soft Chicago carpeting’.

 – Hoc Scripsi

I am also listening to the Rach III while I write this entry out. The poem was written years ago and revised a year ago. I am able to date this one as it talks about when we lived in an apartment which was a very wonderful time that I know our retirement will look similar.
what follows may be vulgar so I am including a jump this time.

yesterday I happened to go off on another blog and misspelled a word that I inadvertently missed, thankfully I don’t consider my self the most intelligent person on the internet. The gist of the post was about how poets ought to do something more creative and vital to the planet than write poetry which the author considered a waste of time. my response is as follows. Warning: cursing, and strong opinions that aren’t necessarily the actual opinion of the author – just making a point…

A lot of people who ought to be smarter tend to base their opinion of poetry on a few so called poets. Most people writing poetry are writing crap and they are better off lighting their pubes on fire and dancing around calling it art.
I downright hate most poetry but I write poetry – I like fistfights, guns, calling the other guy a cocksucker and pissing in the wind if need be – I like to drink, I used to do drugs that weren’t prescribed and so on – in other words I am not like one of the pussies writing their tinkly pretty shit. I write poetry mainly and consider it a life pursuit. I don’t write a lot of fiction because it is a lesser pursuit that uses a lesser language and only one of 18-21 basic plot lines. best said as – prose is putting the right word in the right order, poetry is putting the best words in their best order – I agree with this but of course I would.
I guess what I am trying to say here is simple – fuck you if you think I am inconsequential, fuck you if you don’t try harder to understand the language of poetry, fuck you if you think poetry is not necessary. without poetry there is no language or without poetry the language dies. I think fuck is a perfectly good expression used by a great number of intelligent men and women.

I don’t think most of what I have written here is true for me 3/4 of the time. I just thought the last paragraph was and is how I feel. The first two are written more out of self righteous anger and I could easily write prose against those and mean it.

the coffee is hot and hand huggable, throat burnable, and mostly gratifying.

have a great day.

May 12, 2010

not posting today

by jhon baker

I failed to sleep properly last night and that ended in me getting up late for an appointment I had this morning which was to last until the afternoon. I made the appointment but was unable to post until now due to these circumstances. At this point I think it is going to be easier to not post today than to post this terrible excuse and partial apology for failing in my communication duties.
I gladly slept for a few hours after arriving back at my home, on my couch with a laptop perched on my lain down body and this page up and ready for typing.

I did manage to write the beginning of a poem of indeterminate length but am not including it here. Instead I am putting down a poem that my 6 year old son has just composed.

clouds
when the clouds
blow
a journey

 – not mine

I always hope that I will someday measure up to the person my son is.

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May 11, 2010

Salvador Dali while still dead has a birthday

by jhon baker
I think this is all that needs to be said about Sal. Happy birthday if it’s your thing.

woke up about five thirty this morning and moments before getting dressed I decided right then I needed to make coffee and right then I thought a shower would also be nice. The best part was spending the first part of my day nude. I dare not drink coffee without at least a shirt and underwear of some sort and feeling silly only wearing that I got dressed after the shower but feel clean though clothed now.
48 hour magazine is now available on mag cloud and while I am not in it, as I did nothing on theme as themes bother me and I reach out for moments and abandon themes. The theme also will not allow one to bend into the tangent regularly either. Regardless, the themed magazine is available now should you wish to buy it. I am only still doing adverts for them as they are going to pay the writers a portion of the sales. I will buy one, read it and review it here at my leisure.
yesterday, today and maybe tomorrow

wake
coffee x 2
read papers
coffee
e-mail/internet dialogue
write for awhile

lunch or
peanut butter and
raspberry jam
water
coffee

woodshop (garage)
write for awhile
mail/e-mail
play with son aged five
dinner

time with woman
read/write
sleep if possible if not

write till the river Lethe
washes over dry and blinking eyes.

 – Hoc Scripsi

every time I type out Hoc Scripsi I misspell it by one space on the keyboard. Don’t know why – maybe an ‘O’ at the end makes more sense to me than the ‘i’ does.
Today I am going to go the range and practice for awhile, remember to breathe through the trigger pull and I ought to do well.

my bones feel oddly heavy and even lifting my fingers to type is an effort. This is not the first time I have felt my solidity or experienced a jaw so heavy as to not be able to speak. I am not connected as to why this happens but it always makes me feel heavy and serious.

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