Posts tagged ‘insomnia’

February 18, 2010

written on a small scrap with editorial department address on reverse

by jhon baker

poetry wastes a lot of
paper that could be used
for holding leaves off the
ground.

there are some things
that trees will never
forgive us for;
art – is not one of them.

no matter how bad.

– I wrote this

didn’t sleep last night, slept the night before but not the night before that. I did not keep track of previous nights only to know that most of them were not fit for sleeping. It amazes me how much two ailments can define your life, Chronic Pain and Insomnia, they are related but it is not a causal relationship as insomnia has far outlasted the pain thing.
this has weakened my current creativity or the current will to be inspired. This statement has been horribly alliterative and I must stop at all costs.
Another lit blog I read posed the question – ‘is everyone an artist? – I think the answer is clear, however, the clarity I have on it is not shared by the many so called ‘artists’ who produce less art and more sentimental bullshit that is only capable of relating to the so called artist. This is not art and as the definitions are straying away from the meaningful I have simply stated that I am not an artist. But these questions that the so called artists struggle with is possibly part of what separates them from the real and the so called. This is not entirely accurate but what I would ask is this – if you go into your garage and change your oil with any amount of required skill or acquired knowledge, does this make you a mechanic? or if you cook diligently a meal that feeds yourself and maybe even a few friends – does that make you a chef? you see where I am going with this I hope. The effort and even the correct result do not make you the arbiter of such titles because that would be widely considered a gross misapplication of the terms. You are not an artist because you happen to create something or your friends like what you have done. A wall painter is considered a wall painter and not a wall artist. It seems that the fine arts are under attack by the same unjustified assumption of entitlement that is plaguing our streets and making me fear to leave my house for too long that I might accidentally add murderer to my short list of titles. I kid though I am often tempted to add aggravated battery to that list for the same reasons. I don’t as I don’t want to go to prison, feeling like you are more than you are is not really a corporal punishment offense (tho why not?) and mostly because even though I am a large and intimidating man – I am not a fighter, I am however, a poet.

February 6, 2010

Shipping and Handling

by jhon baker

Really tired at the time I write this and I think that I could rename this blog/journal – the tired associations of J. Baker.
I believe that I am going lie down to read TIME, Robert Gates is on the cover so it may be an informative read as this is someone I don’t know a lot about and I am betting no-one I know does which is a shame as he is the Defense Secretary.From what I know already I would make decisions differently [about defense] but I wonder if I knew what they/he [Gates] knew, would my decisions be the same as theirs or now? Ignorance is not bliss, it is ignorance. Bliss is bliss and I’ve no idea about it at all.

shipping and handling

  – deleted after writer actually thought about it
  – a little more while no longer under the
  – influene of whatever it was he/she
  – was on that day/hour.
  –
  – thank you for your interest.

          – I wrote this

February 5, 2010

Words are dry, meaningless

by jhon baker

Insomnia sufferers of the world unite, or at least get together as to not be bored in the wee hours of morning.
I’ve “suffered” from this malady for as long as I can remember, there must have been a time where sleep came easy and I awoke rested and spry, wasn’t there? In addition there are many poems that begin with the words – can’t sleep – or are about not being able to sleep. There are many tricks to falling under the spell of hypnos and with the exception of drinking warm milk, I’ve tried them all and most seem to work for a few days but all eventually stop working. The only cure it seems was to drink copious amounts of Jack or Johnny Walker or SoCo, those who knew me then will advise against this tactic tho especially as I am not even sure that I even slept, there are only periods of time where I remember nothing and awoke in places I didn’t remember being and all that implies.
I’ve also written profuse amounts of poetry and stories when I should have been dreaming, I would say it is a good time to write but there is always a lot of revision to clean up the mess that was the night before so I prefer to write in the day from when I start going on to when I finish while sometimes stopping for lunch or love.

words are dry, meaningless

words are dry,
expression faceless.
the ladybugs came here to die
on my window;
baking in the sun.

a hundred portraits
unhung,
composing city life.

walks along South Michigan
in Chicago;
children think I am homeless
and dirty.

find Buddha in the patrons .
find Buddha in the hall.
find Buddha on the front steps
of MOMA.
je suis beau!
find Buddha in me!

on these steps I ask for a light;
and I am
not thinking that I’m going to write this
a year later, or more, sitting at
my desk. where
ladybugs come to die
on my window.